Confessions & Correspondence: Elizabeth to Mrs Gardiner

Welcome to our epistolary retelling of Pride & Prejudice! Jane Austen’s original version of the story, First Impression, was told entirely in letters, so it seemed like a great group project. We’ll be posting a new letter every Wednesday. 

Elizabeth to Mrs Gardiner

Longbourn, 25 February 1812

My dearest Aunt,

I must begin by entreating your forgiveness for the long delay of my reply, and assuring you that it has arisen not from indifference, but from a succession of occupations which have laid a most unreasonable claim upon both my time and attention. I have often resolved to write, only to find myself diverted by some immediate concern, or persuaded that I might better execute my purpose on the morrow.

Among the chief of these distractions has been the planning of my approaching journey to Kent. You will not be surprised to hear that this expedition to see my dear friend Charlotte in her new role as Mrs William Collins has occasioned much discussion at Longbourn, and no small degree of preparation on my own part. My mother speaks of nothing beyond her conviction that the Collinses are quite unworthy of our attention as they will surely turn us all out before my father is cold in his grave. My father, meanwhile, has admonished her for such gloomy thoughts, telling her that we should all hope for a better outcome, as indeed he may yet be the survivor. In any case, all this is to say that I have found it difficult to secure a quiet hour for reflection, though my thoughts have often turned to you and to Jane.

Your letter of the fourteenth gave me much to think on, and I thank you sincerely for the openness and tenderness with which you communicated all that had passed. I was grieved, though I cannot pretend astonished, by your account of the Bingley sisters’ visit. That Jane should be treated with the barest civility rather than warmth accords too well with what I had already feared; yet it was painful to learn how clearly the distinctions of London society were pressed upon her, and how little consideration was shown for feelings so gentle and undeserving of such treatment.

Jane has since written to me herself, and her letter confirmed every particular of what you so delicately conveyed. I read it with a mixture of concern and admiration—concern for her disappointment and and admiration for the generosity with which she still seeks to excuse conduct that merits none. That she should pity Miss Bingley, and attribute her altered manners to sisterly anxiety, speaks to her goodness, and though I cannot always follow her so far in charity, I love her the more for it.

I am relieved—truly relieved—that she has resolved to continue the acquaintance no longer. I believe it will spare her much future unhappiness. Nothing, in my opinion, is so wearying as an intimacy maintained on one side alone; and I rejoice that she has discerned the necessity of withdrawing before habit or hope rendered the effort more difficult. That she does so without bitterness, and with every wish to think well of all concerned, convinces me that her heart, though wounded, remains perfectly itself.

Permit me, my dear aunt, to thank you most warmly for all you have done to be of service to her. The comfort of your presence—your steadiness, your affection, your practical good sense—has been of greater value to her than you can know. I am persuaded that, had she been left to herself, the pain of recent events would have pressed far more heavily upon her spirits. That she has borne all of this with such composure is owing, in no small degree, to you.

I am particularly grateful that our journey to Kent will allow us to stop in London, for I am eager to see Jane for myself so that I might judge how she gets on, independent of all written assurances. Nor am I less eager to see my dear aunt and uncle again, and to enjoy, if only for a short time, the comfort of your society, which I have always found so improving to both mind and temper.

As for Mr. Bingley, we must, I suppose, remain content with uncertainty. Jane’s conjectures do him honour, though they may perhaps be kinder than he deserves. Whether he is guided by his sisters’ influence, or by motives of his own, is more than I can pretend to determine. That he should be so near, and yet so entirely absent, is certainly discouraging; but I trust Jane is right in resolving not to dwell upon it.

Pray give my warmest affection to my uncle, and believe me sincerely obliged for every particular of your letter—even for the improvement in your table. I look forward with the greatest pleasure to seeing you in town very soon, and to enjoying your warmth and hospitality. Until then, I remain,

Your ever affectionate and grateful niece,
Elizabeth Bennet

Read all the letters from Confessions & Correspondence here!