The Greatest Risk-Chapter 1 (Revisited)

Happy Friday, Janeites.  This is a post from a few years ago, but now that I am full steam ahead on this “Work In Progress”, I was hoping to get some updated feedback.

–One thing I’ve been asked is if one would have to know the Odyssey to be comfortable reading this novella.

Nope. 🙂

–There are a few allusions, but they will be flushed out for the reader to follow along.

–Also, it isn’t a mash-up, so nothing too in depth will occur.

Now, sit back and get ready to begin my tentatively titled novella “The Greatest Risk.”

 

Chapter 1

 

~July 1811~

 

It had happened. What he had worked his entire life to avoid had occurred, and there was no way to remedy the situation. He had failed.

Fitzwilliam Darcy signaled for the bar maid to bring him another drink, as he relaxed into the darkness of the corner licking his wounds. True, his younger sister Georgiana had not been entirely ruined, but it was enough that George Wickham had made it into his world once again to wreak havoc on those he loved.

And now because of his neglect, for he alone was truly to blame, his dear Georgie was heartbroken in the upstairs room of this miserable excuse for an inn on the way back to London.

I know I should go sit with her, but I cannot. Because of me, her life was almost lost to that rake!

He swallowed the liquid and relished the burn to his throat, feeling that any suffering was deserved. Aware of the passing of time, he looked at his watch, and nodded while dropping a few coins on the table for the girl, and made his way up the stairs towards his quarters. He had no desire to face what was awaiting him alone. Luckily, his cousin Cassandra had had joined him in his carriage for the journey to Ramsgate for holiday with her acquaintance.

Her help was invaluable today! Without her, Georgiana and I would be in desperate measures.

He quietly knocked at his sister’s door, only to have his cousin open it. She signaled to be quiet, and she stepped into the hallway before closing the door behind her and signaled for him to follow her to his room. He excused his valet Briggs and told him to wait outside Miss Darcy’s room until he was released and then would need him again in an hour. They waited until the door closed behind him, before they began.

“How is she?” Darcy asked, sitting down and leaning forward with his hands resting on his legs.

Canterbury Cathedral. Located in Canterbury, Kent, England, UK. Original public domain image from Wikimedia Commons

Cassandra Fitzwilliam, the only daughter of the Earl of Matlock shook her head. “She is not well, Darcy. He truly made her believe he loved her. She was devastated when she overheard your conversation about her dowry. That his love was only worth thirty-thousand pounds.”

“Blast that man, and everything he has ever done to ruin my life and those I love!” Darcy stood and began to pace. “What now? I wish to take her to Pemberley…”

“I think that is a sound plan. She will be safe and protected.”

“And away from the hens of the ton.”

“Yes, that too. Have you heard from Richard?”

“No,” he said, raking his hand through his hair. “Your brother has not responded to the express. I am not sure he has even received it yet, but I am certain he will find us on our way to London.” Colonel Richard Fitzwilliam, second son to the Earl of Matlock was Darcy’s cousin and truest friend. “What was my father thinking upon his death five years ago to entrust my young sister to Richard and myself? How are two bachelors to raise a girl not yet sixteen?” His question hung in the air before he continued. “I will deposit you back at Matlock house. What will you tell your mother about your alteration of plans?”

Cassandra tilted her head and thought for a moment. “That I realized I was not in the mood to spend time at the sea, the weather was not to my liking, and I feared I would find my friends dull.”

He looked at her. “You would lie so easily to Aunt Ellen?”

She smirked at him before replying, “Do you think this is the first time?”

He shook his head. “Your brother often says it is a good thing he and I are the guardians of Georgiana and not you. I now understand why.”

A low chuckle came forth from her mouth and she smiled again. “Never mind that. You, my cousin, do not appear to be ready for bed. The sun has not quite set, but I will retire to be with Georgiana. I know you like to keep your own counsel, but do you wish to tell me what occurred? How you came upon them?”

“No.”

“Darcy, you must discuss it with someone.”  His jaw clenched, and he looked away from her. “Very well. Hold your breath if you wish, just as you did when we were children, but it will not help in the end. Now…you must go clear your mind. No more whiskey.”

“I am not foxed!”

She openly laughed at him. “No, you are not. Not yet, but could be on the path to that state. Go outside and walk around the courtyard. Better yet, there was an abandoned abbey a short distance down the road with lovely wilderness about it. You, cousin, have always needed nature to put you to rights. Whether it was riding Ulysses or just rambling through the woods of Pemberley. Now, do as I say. You will feel better.”

Darcy harrumphed in exasperation and grabbed his hat. “Heaven help Frederick Medford for becoming betrothed to you. You have the spirit of Richard and the looks of your mother. I know not of which lured him in like a Siren.” He clasped her hand and squeezed it before retreating out the door and down the stairs in desperate need of more solitude.

 

XXXXX

 

The trip from Dover had not commenced as Elizabeth had hoped. With the horse throwing a shoe and her young cousins becoming ill in the carriage, Mr. Gardiner determined Canterbury was a fine location to rest for the night. He had recognized his niece’s need to ramble after their circumstances and had permitted her to wander to the relics of the abbey directly across from their lodgings.

“Mind you do not dally too long, Lizzy. Dusk is upon us.”

“Yes, Uncle. I will pay heed to the light and will be back directly.”

She had grabbed a shawl from the carriage and headed across the road towards the broken structure dismissing the maid who had followed her.

“Please see to my Aunt and the children. I will not be long.”

“Yes, Miss.”

And finally… she was alone. The sound of dusk surrounded her as she ambled through the green and around the gatehouse towards the abandoned courtyard. Frogs croaked in a nearby stream, and the trees rustled in the breeze, enveloping her in a calmness she had not felt the previous month. Peace. She loved her young cousins dearly, but after their time in Dover, she appreciated the solitude a moment away could provide. “It is quite a different noise than that I am accustomed to at Longbourn with five sisters. But, it has been a jolly trip, nonetheless.”

An owl began to hoot in the trees, and she continued her walk towards a small path at the back of the structure. Finding a set of stone steps, she descended into the remnants of a church whose roof had long rotted away. The small pillars of stone throughout were enchanting. She sat on a forgotten bench in an alcove, enjoying the silence and the golden light of the sinking sun with grass and wildflowers blooming around the outskirts. Her bliss was soon interrupted however, by the sound of crunching rocks and fierce grumbles from the outer wall behind. Her heart began to race as the sound of footsteps upon the stone stairs could be heard with the agitated motion of someone coming within the small courtyard.

The light had not completely descended, nor would it for another half an hour, but she was trapped in a most dangerous predicament. Alone, with whom she knew not, far from the safety of her Aunt and Uncle.

 

XXXXX

 

16th Century Inn

Cassandra was right. I needed to get out of the inn and move. The walk had not taken too long, maybe a quarter of an hour, but it was much needed. Darcy grumbled and kicked at loose stones before walking down the steps in the back of the abbey and finding himself surrounded by stone pillars original to the church. “Aaargh!!!” he yelled aloud, allowing his frustration to break free from his always perfectly held façade. He took his walking stick and swung at the wall. “Why?” he yelled again. “Why must you continue to ruin our lives?”

He dropped his stick and leaned his back against a small outcropping on the wall, his shoulder sagging. “I have failed her,” he said above a whisper. “I have failed her. Forgive me father, I have failed.”

 

 

Elizabeth could not move. If she did, the tall gentleman would see her, but if she did not, she ran the risk of eavesdropping on more of his innermost thoughts. What to do?

He was a fair distance from her…maybe twenty yards. I might be able to leave undetected? However, she realized that was most likely not so. Preparing to face the embarrassment of the situation, she delicately cleared her throat.

He shot to his feet instantly. “Who is there?” he asked, looking around the ruins.

“It is nobody, sir.”

“Nobody? And I am Polyphemus the cyclops to you, Odysseus? Show yourself at once!”

Her ire was piqued by his rude tone, but she stood and came from the alcove.

“Why were you concealed in the alcove?”

“I was not concealed,” she said taking a fortifying breath. “I was merely resting when you came down the steps.”

“Are you alone?” he asked looking around, before allowing his eyes to settle back upon her.

“I am not in the habit of setting up assignations, if that is what you are implying.”

“What is your business here?”

She bristled at his tone. “I am traveling with my Aunt and Uncle and we just stopped for the night on the way to my father’s estate. I needed to walk.”

He stared at her, his gaze unwavering. “Alone?”

“As you see. I was enjoying the solitude, as you yourself were.”

He looked her up and down, skepticism in his countenance. “But I am a man. Society does not censure my actions as it would a woman’s.”

“I am not dictated to by all of society’s demands.”

“What did you hear?”

Although her anger had risen to almost uncontrollable heights, she softened her tongue, remembering the man’s miserable appearance and dejected words only moments before. “I heard nothing you did not wish me to hear.”

He stared at her again before drawing his shoulders back and looking down his nose at her. “Do you know who I am?”

“Should I?” she asked, taken aback at his question. “Save Prinny himself, there is no one I would anticipate such a question from.” She brushed off her skirts, and raised her chin. “I believe this conversation will have no proper end. It is also not in my best interest to be alone with a strange man. If you will excuse me?” Beginning to move past him, he stayed her with his voice.

“Forgive me, Madame,” he said, in almost the same repentant tone he had used moments before in talking to his personal demons. “You are obviously a gentlewoman and it was unpardonable the way I spoke to you.”

Elizabeth looked at his eyes, deep pools of sadness and acknowledged his penitence. “You need not ask my forgiveness, sir. But if I may say, it sounds as if you need to forgive yourself.”

A long breath exhaled from his lips. “Bless me Father, for I have sinned…” he muttered.

She chuckled, “I am neither priest, nor Catholic, but can listen with impunity, if you wish?”

He looked up at her sharply.

She continued. “I do not know your name, nor you mine. Whatever secret you wish to tell will go to my grave. You need not fear reprisal, only taste absolution.”

“I do not believe absolution is possible, Miss…Nobody.”

She smiled at his attempt at humor. “It is your decision, Sir. However, I have always believed a problem shared is a problem halved. Might I help in some way?”

 

~~~*~~~

 

There was no artifice in her; this slip of a woman who had scared him witless only moments before. Not for her size or force, but for her mere presence.  Had I said anything to incriminate Georgie in anyway? He measured her appearance. A gentlewoman by all accounts in speech and manner.  Albeit, a poor gentlewoman, by the appearance of last years’ made-over dress. Miss Bingley would not be seen alive in such an outdated gown. But, Miss Bingley would have already blackmailed me into marriage for my cryptic confession moments ago. There is a playfulness of spirit in this girl’s features, and she is quite pretty, in a non-classical sort of way.

Fitzwilliam Darcy was a man who tried to follow his instincts, and at this moment, they were telling him to believe this woman.

“It is my sister.” He felt the dam beginning to burst.

“Your sister,” she asked, shifting her weight to the other foot. “Is she ill?”

Darcy shook his head, and indicated the alcove where she had been sitting on the log. “She is to inherit a large dowry, and a fortune hunter convinced her to elope. She is but fifteen years old.”

They walked together and occupied the alcove. “Oh my,” she gasped. “How did this happen? Were they acquaintances?”

Darcy swallowed. “He was my father’s godson. We had grown up together on our family’s estate, his father as my father’s steward. Upon the death of his, my father educated him and promised a living. Shortly after my own father’s death five years ago, he instead asked for the value of the living, renouncing all claims to it.

“I believed that was the last we would see of him. He had grown quite…disreputable and was no longer the type of man I wanted in my sister’s company, or in any proper lady’s company for that matter. After a year, he squandered the funds both my father had bequeathed him as well as those I had paid him, and came requesting more. When I denied him, he said that I would pay in the end. And today…I almost did.”

 

~~~*~~~

 

He had grown quiet, this handsome man sitting next to her. He was quite tall, with wavy brown hair, and although she imagined he carried a heavy burden, his posture was still erect.

His pain was palpable, and she wished there was a way she could comfort him. “How were they discovered?” she asked softly, not wanting to press his trust, but also realizing just as her elder sister Jane often needed prodding over the worrisome patches of conversation, it seemed this gentleman did as well.

“I had rented a house for her and her companion in…” here he stopped and looked at her.

“It is of no consequence.”

A small smile of gratitude crept at his lips, before he continued. “I had rented the house and determined to surprise her, as my business in London had concluded. I arrived…I arrived to find them alone together in the parlor of the house, and her chaperone nowhere to be found.” He lowered his head and shook it. “She was as yet…unharmed, but his words cut her more deeply than anything.”

“His words?”

“When I confronted him, and she confessed her love, he…mocked her. He broke her spirit by professing to only have pursued her for her dowry; for his vengeance upon me for withholding more money; for knowing she was too young and gullible to see through his plan.”

“That sweet girl. She must have been heart broken.”

“She has not stopped crying since we left. Luckily, our cousin was to holiday with her friends in…the same town and I had brought her with me. She is with Geo––my sister now.” He caught himself and gave a sheepish grin. “Forgive me. It is not that I do not trust you, but…”

“I am Nobody, Polyphemus. That was our agreement.”

He nodded gratefully.

“So, what is to become of your sister now?”

He lowered his head, beaten. “I hardly know. We, my cousin and I, will attempt to repress any mention of her almost ruin so that she may make her debut in society in two years’ time. That is, my other cousin. He and I are my sister’s guardians. Not that I have been doing well at it.”

“You, Sir, do not know how to be a parent and a brother to a fifteen-year-old girl. And one quite a bit younger than you, if I am correct?” He nodded. “We women are a challenging breed, unlike horses or sheep. What we wish one moment changes rapidly the next.”

He raised a brow in question.

“I am the second eldest daughter with three younger sisters.”

“A total of five?”

“Yes. And no brothers.”

“How does your father manage all of you?”

“He does not. Nor does my mother, but that is of no consequence to your story. As the sun is setting, and I must be off, might I make an observation?”

“Please.” He waited patiently for words which she hoped would offer him some succor.

She gazed into his eyes and smiled. “You did not fail. Failure would have been if your sister had eloped at the first mention of the scheme from this wastrel. But, she did not. That is a testament to her love and respect for you and your family. She did not, and therefore, you did not fail.”

“But––”

“No, buts, Polyphemus,” she chuckled standing up, attempting to break the unknown warmth coursing through her as this stranger continued to gaze into her eyes. “You did not fail. You have raised a young woman who knows what is right, but was charmed by a…practiced seducer?” He nodded at her assumption. “Then by all accounts, you are victorious.”

“But, what should I say to her? She must be told this behavior was unacceptable.”

Elizabeth shook her head. “And why must you tell her something she already knows? She is aware it was wrong, or would have left with him immediately. No. What she needs is to know you do not detest her…You do not detest her, correct?”

“Of course not. She is a child.”

“Yes. Then you must tell her that she is not to blame and help her remember her worth to you and your family.” The last rays of the setting son could be seen stretching over the ruins. She gazed at them before speaking.  “It grows late, and I must return to my family. Goodbye, and good luck, Sir.” She curtseyed and began to walk towards the steps

“Wait,” he cried from behind her. “You must allow me to escort you to your inn. I cannot have you walk back unchaperoned.”

“But I have been unchaperoned this whole time, and nothing amiss has occurred.”

“Yes, but you were in my company.”

“Yes, and you are a cyclops! How I made it out alive is beyond me.” A laugh emanated from her. “I am grateful I did not have to tie myself to the underbelly of grazing sheep.”

“That a woman can site the Odyssey…” she heard him say as she continued on. “But, you must allow me.”

“Then you will meet my Uncle and our agreement will be void. No. You may stand and watch me to the Inn if it suits you, but you cannot approach.”

“Then we will part here?” he asked, stopping her with his tone.

“Yes, we will,” she said turning and coming back to stand in front of him. “I wish you well with your sister.”

“And I you on your journey. I feel there is a debt I wish I could repay. Your words have held wisdom which is a balm to my soul. Thank you,” he said, taking her gloved hand and kissing her knuckles. “You know not what you have done.”

He looked up from her hand, and the reflection from the moon behind her shone in his eyes. Her breath caught and held for a moment, as he smiled, his dimples showing for the first and last time as she curtseyed again, and raced up the stairs and across the lawn, almost as fast as her heart.

29 comments

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    • Pip on April 11, 2025 at 1:51 am
    • Reply

    ❤️ this ! The early meeting of Mr Darcy and Elizabeth has me hooked and wanting even more

    1. Thank you, Pip. I hope it meets your expectations when it is published in the Fall.

    2. Thank you, Pip. Hoping to have more for you soon. 🙂

    • Taswmom on April 11, 2025 at 1:56 am
    • Reply

    Oh, I loved this! I loved this honest and sweet introduction (of a sort) to each other! I look forward to reading the finished work.

    1. Thank you, Taswmom. I’m working to make that happen soon. 🙂

    • Carol aka DrCatMom on April 11, 2025 at 3:03 am
    • Reply

    Looking forward to reading this book. A novella seems too short for the story you have begun. I agree that knowledge of the Odyssey is not required. This is an interesting first meeting and has so many directions possible for the next meeting.

    1. Carol, your thoughts on a novella being too short might come to pass while I continue to plow through my chapters. We’ll have to see if your words were prophetic. 🙂

    • Valérie Bergerre on April 11, 2025 at 6:19 am
    • Reply

    I like it very much and look forward to read the whole book!

    1. Thank you, Valerie. I am glad you enjoyed it.

    • Doris Knuchel Studer on April 11, 2025 at 6:21 am
    • Reply

    Well, I am not fond of crumbs ( I prefer the whole loaf) and usually do not read them, but here I did and I am glad I did 😁​
    Will there be a complete book soon? I am looking forward to it.
    Impatient greetings
    Doris

    1. Thank you Doris. your loaf and crumbs analogy is perfect, as I feel the same way. (I will also say your words brought to mind a great loaf of sourdough I have at home. 🙂 ) The book is almost complete and I plan to have it to the editor soon.

    • Glynis on April 11, 2025 at 7:08 am
    • Reply

    I remember this and enjoyed it! I can’t wait for the complete story. Hopefully when they meet again he won’t insult her and she will remember his description of Wickham? 🥰🥰

    1. You’ll have to wait and see, Glynis! 🙂

    • Rebecca L McBrayer on April 11, 2025 at 8:20 am
    • Reply

    I loved this story. I am eager to read the rest!

    1. Thank you, Rebecca! Hopefully you’ll have it in your hands soon.

    • G on April 11, 2025 at 8:27 am
    • Reply

    That is a lovely story. Thank you.

    1. Thank you, G. I’m so glad you enjoyed it. 🙂

    • Carole in Canada on April 11, 2025 at 8:39 am
    • Reply

    Looks like I am not the only one who has been waiting for this story to reappear. We can only hope that it’s journey to publication will soon be reaching its end.

    1. Thank you, Carole. I appreciate your words and support for all JAFF writers.

    • Hollis on April 11, 2025 at 11:43 am
    • Reply

    oh my, I want to read this so much. Please, please finish and publish.

    1. Thank you, Hollis! I’m doing my best to get it done. 🙂

    • Kelley on April 11, 2025 at 12:28 pm
    • Reply

    I am not only a Janeite, but an English teacher who has taught the Odyssey many times. I LOVED this. I keep telling myself, no more P and P fan fic–read fan fic based on the other books if I must, but no more P and P. (There is a huge abundance of it.) But then I read something like this, and I’m sucked in again. Thank you for sharing this. I can’t way to read the whole thing.

    1. Thank you, Kelley! Your comments make my heart happy! I have been trying to balance the amount of ‘The Odyssey’ because I don’t want people to feel overwhelmed. It’s a fine line between nerdy allusions and complete disregard for someone who isn’t familiar with Homer. 🙂

    • Rosemarie McLaughlin on April 11, 2025 at 5:12 pm
    • Reply

    Perfect in every way. I can’t wait to read more.

    1. Thank you, Rosmarie. I’m so glad you enjoyed it! 🙂

    • J. W. Garrett on April 11, 2025 at 6:58 pm
    • Reply

    Oh, I loved this story. I am so excited to see the progress in this revision. Is Elizabeth going to be Odysseus in his thoughts? That is what he called out in the ruins. He is Cyclops in her thoughts. I love this.

    1. Thank you, J.W. for your input. You’ll have to wait and see. 🙂

    • SAF on April 11, 2025 at 10:38 pm
    • Reply

    Cyclops?!? I love it! Also, clever twist on our favorite couple. Can’t wait to read more!

    • Kate on April 12, 2025 at 9:33 am
    • Reply

    Love it! That’s a great read. Thankyou.

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