Pride and Prejudice or Ship of Fools, by Jack Caldwell

Greetings everyone. Jack Caldwell here.

I have had the pleasure of reading and re-reading Miss Jane Austen’s major works many times, and while Persuasion remains my favorite, I can certainly understand the immense popularity of  her wonderful novel Pride and Prejudice. Heck, I’ve written ten variations of, and sequels to, P&P in the last nineteen years, so that ought to tell you something.

There is a reason I keep coming back to Pride and Prejudice. Actually two:

• The characters act like real people, and
• Pride and Prejudice is funny.

Thanks to most of the adaptations of Miss Austen’s great novel, however, many fans who have not read the book may not realize that Pride and Prejudice is a comedy. For some reason, the screenwriters and directors of the movies and mini-series want the thing to be a romantic drama. They are enjoyable, to be sure, but they are wrong. Miss Austen could have titled her novel Ship of Fools because just almost everyone in it acts in a silly or foolish manner.

Okay, I can hear the screams of outrage from the Elizabeth Bennet fans and the devotees of Fitzwilliam Darcy. Hang with me for a bit while I make my argument.

First, one must place themselves into the intended audience of the novel: early 19^th Century Regency England. It was a time of a rigid social structure. Upper mobility was very limited; the merchant class had yet to make inroads into the landed gentry and the London Ton. The Industrial Revolution was just gaining ground. Everyone knew where they stood in society and were mostly comfortable with it.

Except the folks in Pride and Prejudice, which was Miss Austen’s intention. She gives her characters warts, many of them humorous and/or exaggerated, which makes them real and relatable. Her audience would have recognized these people and would have laughed at their foolishness.

Let’s run through the primary cast, shall we?

Lizzy Bennet – In the first half of the book, she acts like the smartest person in the room. She owns the undeserved conceit of the young. Her intellect is so great that her first impressions are always exact, correct, and fixed. Her famous wit can be cutting and nearly insulting. She is free to despise those who hurt her feelings. Miss Smarty-Pants is never wrong — until she gets The Letter in Hunsford. She then realizes just how mistaken she has been. It is the end of Lizzy Bennet and the birth of a wiser and quieter Elizabeth Bennet.

Fitzwilliam Darcy – A guy who should know better. He’s had teachers, tutors, and a father who was respected as a wonderful master and landlord. He’s smart and knows it. His parents spoiled him, sure, but Eton and Cambridge should have taken him down a peg or two. Yet, this dunderhead delivers the second-worst proposal in British history. Let’s face it, Darcy couldn’t be bothered to overcome his reserve, and remove that poker up his backside, until a certain bright-eyed beauty read him the riot act.

Jane Bennet – A classic goodie-two-shoes. She doesn’t express a definite negative opinion until late in the book. Frankly, she’s tiresome.

Charles Bingley – Are we sure Bingley can walk and chew gum at the same time?

Caroline Bingley – Yeah, yeah, the original mean-girl. Except she’s so blind to Darcy’s obvious disinterest she comes across as missing half her brain. For cryin’ out loud, Darcy’s a rich, solvent, landed gentleman, the grandson of a earl, and nephew to judges and bishops. He ain’t marrying a girl from trade, no matter how big her chest is or how much dowry she’s got in the bank.

The Bennet sisters – Caricatures, each and every one of them. The pious nincompoop, the non-entity, and the proto-slut.

Mr. Bennet – He starts out as a long-suffering wit, but by the end of the book his lazy, careless, misanthropic character is revealed.

Mrs. Bennet – Retains the maturity level of a fifteen-year-old. Militia officers were made up of young men paid to take the place of young gentleman escaping their 5-year requirement. She should know that the chances of one of them being a younger son of a peer was almost non-existent. How are her daughters going to live on a lieutenant’s pay of £7 pounds a month? Her gossipy sister, Mrs. Phillips, is worse.

Sir William Lucas – Enough said.

George Wickham – Talk about the guy who can’t shoot straight. He’s lucky to be the godson of a prosperous landowner and the boyhood friend with the heir. So what does Straw-for-Brains do? He blows everything—alienates the heir, wastes a fortune, fails to seduce an heiress, deserts the military (losing his commission and potentially his life), and is stuck with the silliest wife in all England. In the immortal words of Bugs Bunny, “What a maroon!”

William Collins – One of the great clowns in literature. One did not need to be pious to be a vicar, but to worship his “benefactor” as he does? He belongs in an asylum. Miss Austen is satirizing the clergy.

Lady Catherine de Bourgh – She is the daughter of an earl and the widow of a baronet, yet she acts as if she a Duchess and a member of the peerage. She is as big a clown as Collins.

Georgiana Darcy – A heiress with £30,000, she should have known better than to think of eloping with a penniless seducer, but one cannot laugh at her. She’s a child.

Colonel Fitzwilliam – The famous Loud-Mouthed Plot Device, solely in the story to drop a dime on his cousin Mr. Darcy. This guy can’t keep a secret to save his life. Lord help the British Army!

The only ones in Pride and Prejudice who do not come across as fools, clowns, or self-destructive morons are Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner, Charlotte Lucas, and most of the servants. Think about that for a bit, especially what they have in common.

Of course, JAFF authors have “adjusted” Miss Austen’s characters to fit their plots, which is perfectly acceptable. Darcy is clueless, Caroline and/or Lady Catherine become malicious, Wickham is the source of all evil, Mrs. Bennet is hateful towards Elizabeth, and Mr. Collins is a short, oily weasel instead of a tall, pompous windbag. I have thoroughly enjoyed many of these fine books.

The one thing I can’t figure out, however, is the transformation of Colonel Fitzwilliam into the handsome, all-knowable Stud-Muffin, whose courting advice to Darcy saves the day. He’s a blank slate, true, and authors can do as they like, but how is a soldier who has never married going to know anything about wooing a lady? I much prefer someone like Amy D’Orazio’s brilliant Viscount Saye in that role.

(I accept cash or dark chocolate for endorsements, Amy. Hehe.)

As for me, I have “reformed” Mary, Kitty, Caroline, and even Mrs. Bennet (to a point) in many of my efforts, although I usually leave Mr. Bennet as the jerk he is.

I admit Pride and Prejudice is not the funniest book ever written. (For my money, it’s The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, but I digress.) However, the novel is humorous, heartwarming, and delightful, a book one can return to time and again. Of the adaptations, unfortunately, only the 1940 and 1980 ones try to capture the humor.  Heck, the Bollywood Bride and Prejudice does a great job as a comedy musical. The other adaptations–not so much.

So, this is one man’s opinion: Pride and Prejudice is a Ship of Fools. What’s your opinion? Remember, I’m talking about Miss Austen’s novel, not the adaptations. That’s a discussion for another day.

Boy, that will be a doozy!

Until next time, this has been the Cajun Cheesehead Chronicles.

It takes a real man to write historical romance, so let me tell you a story…