Leap into Love Interlude by Monica Fairview

Today should be the last day of February, but it isn’t, so I still have a chance to Leap into Love. For today’s romantic moment, I’ve decided to share one of my early Pride & Prejudice sequels, The Darcy Cousins. Of course, I have to put up a *spoiler alert. I do love this scene, I must say, and I hope it makes sense to those of you who haven’t read The Darcy Cousins. I should clarify that Clarissa is one of the Darcy cousins, but the story actually focuses on Georgiana. The Darcy Cousins is a continuation of The Other Mr. Darcy, although it can be read independently. 

Well, then, I’ll leave you to enjoy it. 

“Miss Darcy,” he said, trying it out. The words came out more clearly, though his voice still rasped. “I owe you — I have wanted to apologize since that terrible episode at The King’s Arms – my behaviour on that occasion –.” He drew himself up. This was going nowhere. “I can only excuse my contemptible behaviour by reminding you that I had suffered a blow on the head after falling from a carriage, and I had been unconscious for a considerable time. Perhaps that will go some way towards explaining why I was not thinking clearly.”

            It was really quite pathetic of him to use his accident as an excuse. It was, in fact, despicable. He was trying to ring every ounce of sympathy he could from her. He was disgusted with himself for doing it, but he needed every advantage he could get.

            His words had some of the desired effect, for Miss Darcy put a hand to her mouth, and turned quite pale.

           “Oh – why did I never think – I cannot believe that I forgot – but of course!” she cried, staring at him in dismay “No — it is I who should apologize. After what happened – I did not even consider that you were experiencing shock – after the blood loss – and your head was – how are you feeling now?”

            He was completely taken aback by this very mundane question.

            “I am perfectly well, thank you.”

            She smiled. Oh, how he loved this particular smile of hers. It was so genuine, so simple, and yet it had the power to wrench his heart.

            “I am very glad you are fully recovered,” she said, in a very polite tone.

            He could bear it no longer. He had to hear it, from her own lips, so that his fate would be sealed, and he would walk away from there, and put it all behind him. Even if it would wrench him apart.

            “This engagement…” he said, leaving it open, unable to speak the words and make them true.

            “Oh, you already saw Mrs Moffet,” she said, grinning broadly, grinning, for heaven’s sake, just because she was going to marry Moffet. He half turned away.

            “I suppose I should express my good wishes.”

            “I suppose so,” said Georgiana, looking faintly puzzled “It is not urgent, surely? You can stay for a while, can’t you?”

            He must be imagining things, because he thought he had heard the tiniest hint of pleading in her voice. So tiny that he must have made it up, just because he wanted it to be there. He had thought his injury completely healed. But now his head was beginning to throb, just where the cut had been when he was injured.

            “If you meant, am I going to ride straight over to offer Moffet my felicitations, then, no, of course not.”

            Not over his dead body.

            “Moffet?” she asked. “Is Moffet engaged, too? Goodness! Who is he going to marry?”

            It took him a long moment to translate her words into some semblance of meaning. Then, as the meaning sank in, the oppression in his head and the throbbing all slid away, as if by magic.

            In a few long strides, he was in front of her.

            “You are not engaged to Moffet?” he said, standing very very close to her.

            “No, though he did propose—”

            A fierce sense of triumph swept through him. She would not be able to wriggle out of it this time. He would make sure she did not slip through his hands.

            “Then you will marry me,” he said, making it very clear that it was not open to discussion.

            She took a step backwards, then another.

            “Mr Gatley,” she said, in a tone that made it very clear that she did mean to argue. “I would like to know by what right you come barging in here, and ordering me – commanding me – to marry you. Just because I accepted your apology—”

            His heart sank. Why had he thought that just by apologizing, everything that had happened between them would conveniently melt away?

            He should have known that matters with Miss Georgiana Darcy could never be simple. He looked into hazel eyes speckled with anger and understood that nothing but the absolute truth would do.

            “I said earlier that my injuries partly account for my behaviour that day. But it was not true. They were just a convenient excuse. The fact was, I was taken by surprise. I overheard Darcy’s accusations, and I – I was bitterly disappointed. I believed at the time, you see, that I had finally found someone I would like to spend my life with. That you were — and then suddenly the carpet was pulled from under my feet. It never occurred to me to doubt Darcy, not for a moment.”

            He shut his eyes, partly because he did not want to see her expression, partly because he wanted to hide the pain that sprung up whenever he even thought of that afternoon. “And I believed you then to be under your cousin’s power.”

            He opened his eyes and shook his head, but carefully avoided glancing at her face.

            “I can scarcely believe myself capable of such folly. Perhaps I wilfully allowed myself to be misled because I did not want to face the reality – which was that my feelings were threatening to overcome my reason. I believed you then to be too easily influenced, and I have always promised myself never to marry a woman who was not as strong as I, for that is the road to unhappiness. I have seen it only too well in the case of my aunt. Darcy’s words only confirmed to me what I feared, and I did not stop long enough to question them.

            “When I look back at it, it seems ludicrous. Why would you have me drive you all the way to Richmond for an assignation, when you could easily arrange one somewhere in London? It is not as if London lacks establishments where this could be accomplished. And then to think that Miss Clarissa – ” He paused, a tinge of colour darkening his cheekbone, “It is really quite embarrassing to recollect what I believed at that moment.”

             He turned and looked at her now, straight into her eyes. “I can only hope that, once again, you can bring yourself to overcome your resentment – however well deserved – and to forgive me, even if this time, I hardly deserve forgiveness.”

            She shook her head vigorously. “Enough!” she said, sounding pained. “You were not entirely to blame. We did lie to you. We did deceive you. And then I did not offer you any explanation at all. What were you to think?”

            She hesitated. “I still do not feel comfortable telling you the truth. Suffice it to say that we were visiting a young woman we know, and that I had promised not to reveal anything about her to anyone. You can reach your own conclusions about this, but I can assure you that we had no ulterior motives except to see her. I am sorry, but I do not feel that I can reveal our reasons to you even now.”

            “Then in heaven’s name let us put the whole thing behind us!” said Gatley. “I do not need to hear anything more. It does not matter. As you pointed out then, it is all a matter of trust. I can assure you now, that I would trust you with my life.”

            “You say so now,” said Georgiana, her brow creasing, her whole expression lacking conviction, “but how am I to know that the next time something like this occurs, you will not yet again point the finger of accusation at me? How do I know that it will not happen again?”

            “If it ever should occur again, you must remind me of this moment. But beyond that, one can never be certain. I have given you my trust. I can do nothing else but ask you to trust me in turn.”

            She stood before him, considering.

He wanted to take her in his arms and kiss her until every doubt inside her dissolved, but he could not. He forced himself to stand apart, hands at his sides, until she reached her own conclusion. If she decided against him, he would surely have to accept her verdict.

            If he could touch her, she would know how he felt about her.

            If he touched her, however, he would not know how she felt, without being swayed by him. He wanted the decision to come from her alone.

            She considered for so long that his resolve began to crumble.

            But then, with a strangled cry, she stumbled forward and put out her arms to him. He stepped into them and pressed her fiercely against him.

            “How could I not trust you, when I love you so very much?” he said, his lips moving against her hair.

            She burrowed her head into his chest. He relished the feeling for a single moment longer, then he pulled her away from him. He needed to know what she felt.

            “I want to see your face,” he said. It sounded too much like a command. “Please?” he said.

            She looked up then. Her eyes flickered, different emotions rippling through the different shades in her hazel eyes. 

            “Can you bring yourself to trust me?” he asked, again, since she had not answered. He had to know that at least, if nothing else. If she could not give him more, then so be it.

            “I trust you,” she replied, shyly. Then, more confidently, with a smile trembling on her lips, she repeated “Yes, I trust you, Mr Gatley.”

            It was the only answer he needed. To still the trembling of her lips, he bent forward and steadied them with his own. He meant only to kiss her gently, to give her just a hint of his feelings. But to his surprise she flung her arms around his neck and drew him closer, standing on tiptoe to intensify the kiss.

            His senses reeled. Only the certain knowledge that Darcy was in the house, and would be upon them any moment, prevented him from surrendering to the moment. He pulled away from her gently.

            “I think we ought to stop now,” he said, “before matters progress too far.”

            She stepped back. He expected her to be embarrassed, but instead she had the look of a woman who is very well pleased with herself.

            It put him at a disadvantage, because he was not satisfied at all, not by a long margin.

            “I am glad we have resolved things,” he said, with just a touch of vexation.

            “But we have not resolved things at all,” said Georgiana. “We have only resolved the question of trust.”

            “What more do you want?” he cried. “I have told you I love you. Does that count for nothing?”

            Her eyes darkened again. “It counts for a great deal,” she said.

            “And?” he said, waiting for her to say something more. But she did not.

             Everything was suddenly uncertain. The next few instants would determine his life. What if she meant to say no? He could not bring himself to say the words.

“Yes, Mr Gatley, I will marry you,” she answered, even though he had not asked the question, at least, he had not asked it now.

*~~*