Celebrating Pride Month

Hello everyone,

I remember when my daughter was making her way through primary and secondary school, each month we would get an email that listed all the events, holidays, and groups being celebrated. Inevitably, there would be many. June is one of those months, and in this post and another in about ten days, I want to acknowledge two important issues we celebrate this last month of spring/first month of summer: Pride and, in Canada, National Indigenous History. Both of these are complex subjects, and I am only (and barely) skimming the surface, but I wanted to provide some insight into them. I’ve written short Austen-inspired vignettes related to them, broadly drawing on the monthly theme of ‘Flights of Fancy’.

This time, I focus on Pride, specifically lesbians in the Regency in England, a time when homosexuality was illegal. In England, homosexual acts between consenting adults over the age of 21 were not decriminalized until 1967. (The same was done in Canada two years later, under the guidance of then Justice Minister and Attorney General Pierre Trudeau, the father of our current Prime Minister.)

I am by no means an expert on this topic, but from what I’ve read, much of the outrage in the Regency was directed at men engaged in same-sex activities rather than women. Robert Morrison, in his excellent 2019 book, The Regency Years. During Which Jane Austen Writes, Napoleon Fights, Byron Makes Love, and Britain Becomes Modern, wrote that homosexuality was an explosive topic, and “it united groups from every class and background in common cause of loathing and rabid persecution”. Likewise, Mortimer, in The Time Traveller’s Guide to Regency Britain, reports that between 1805 and 1830, at least forty-five men were hanged for sodomy. However, men and women in physical same-sex relationship were not treated in the same manner, likely because, as Morrison wrote, “most people simply regarded the possibility of sex between two females as inconceivable”.

To understand this, we need to consider the views on gender at the time and reflect on the concept of ‘romantic friendships’. Romantic friendships are ones that are emotionally intimate and very affectionate. Romantic friendship between women were glorified and seen as evidence of pure love. They were virtuous and something to be encouraged between women because it kept women’s attention fixed on other women rather than on developing relationships (especially romantic) with men. With each other, women could be uninhibited and trusting; this was not possible with men.

To use an example we are all familiar with, Jane and Cassandra Austen had what could be described as a romantic friendship, though their sisterhood adds another layer to it. Moore mentions them, recalling that their mother said the sisters were ‘wedded to each other’, and Cassandra was deeply affected when Jane died, writing ‘it is as if I had lost a part of myself’.

Gender was an important organizing feature of the Regency era (and many others). Women were assigned the spaces of home and ‘private’, while men belonged in the ‘public’ sphere beyond the home. Women spent a lot of time at home—where they could go unaccompanied was limited, especially for gentlewomen and those who wished to be viewed as virtuous and upstanding. Because of this, women spent a lot of time together, including sharing a bed. Under the concept of romantic friendship, there was nothing wrong about this—and it was a normal practice at the time. This gave women an easy way to develop and hide physically intimate (sexual) relationships with each other. Yet, given views on gender, if society conceived it as possible for women to enter into physically-intimate relationships—which, to be clear, would not be acceptable—it would make men suspicious of their wives, daughters, sisters, etc., and men would no longer be able to simply consign the realm of ‘home’ to women. In other words, it was necessary to view romantic friendships between women as pure and based on the emotional not physical because to do otherwise would be to disrupt a basic tenet of how society was organized.

Beyond this, women were seen to be sexually passive. Men needed women to arouse them sexually, and respectable women would not engage in sexual activity unless it was intended to produce a child or perhaps to please her husband.

A legal case from the early 1800s illustrates the societal perspective on lesbian relationships. It involves two schoolteachers, Marianne Woods and Jane Pirie, one of their pupils, Jane Cumming, and her grandmother, Lady Cumming Gordon. It began in Scotland, where Woods and Pirie opened a boarding school for young gentlewomen in 1809. Jane Cumming became unhappy there. Her grandmother withdrew her, citing ‘very serious reasons’, and encouraged other families to do the same. Woods and Pirie ended up having to close the school as a result.

Woods and Pirie brought a libel suit against Lady Cumming Gordon, and at trial, her lawyer accused Pirie and Woods of ‘indecent and criminal practices’, that is, of having a sexual relationship. The chief evidence was the testimony of Jane Cumming, who claimed the women had engaged in sex while sharing a bed with her. (Students shared beds, and it appears one of the teachers shared a bed with Jane Cumming.)

Woods and Pirie’s lawyer based his argument on the accusation being an outrage to virtuous (romantic) friendship. The women were found guilty, had this verdict overturned on appeal, and the case eventually landed in the House of Lords, where the finding of innocence was upheld. I’m drawing on Morrison’s book for the following quotes from two of the judges involved. Lord Meadowbank stated that, “the virtues, the comforts, and the freedom of domestic intercourse, mainly depend on the purity of female manners, and that, again, on the habits of intercourse remaining as they have hitherto been,—free from suspicion”, while Lord Gillies simply said, “I do believe that the crime here alleged has no existence”.

In other words, they could not conceive of the notion that two women could have sex with each other. Beyond that, finding them guilty was fraught with peril. If the lords agreed that the women had aroused each other, it raised the possibility that other women could also arouse each other, including respectable, God-fearing British women. This was entirely unthinkable because it would disrupt the underlying social order. As Morrison wrote, the women were found innocent because they had to be.

One final note on the legal case. Moore hints that racism played a part in the Woods-Pirie case. Jane Cummings was born in India to an Indian woman and Lady Cumming Gordon’s son, who were not married, making Jane both illegitimate and dark skinned. Some of the judges in the House of Lords felt that her ‘Hindoo’ background was the source of her story about the women. They, in effect, argued that ‘race’ determined sexuality more than gender does, so while it was possible for two women of other ‘races’, including those from India, to have a satisfying sexual relationship—because they had ‘abnormal’ bodies—such as thing was not possible amongst respectable (White) British women who, naturally, had ‘normal’ bodies. (I don’t think a hint is necessary here; it seems like a pretty clear case of racism.)

We will never know the truth about Woods and Pirie’s relationship, or how many women were involved in short- or long-term same-sex relationships (beyond ‘romantic friendship’) during the Regency era, but undoubtedly there were many. This Pride month, I celebrate that, increasingly, people do not have to hide their sexuality, although until that applies to everyone, the work is not done.

On to the vignette. I’ve changed the date of the Woods-Pirie legal case in it. Although it began in 1812, it took about nine years to complete, including the appeals up to the House of Lords. I want it to have finished by the fall of 1811.

From a young age, Kitty Bennet knew she was not like her sisters, lacking Jane’s and Lydia’s beauty, Mary’s steadfastness, and Elizabeth’s charm and intelligence. There was something different about her, though she could never tell exactly what it was, and she had absolutely never voiced it to anyone, not even Lydia. Especially not Lydia, who would tell the world everything Kitty or anyone else said, if she thought it would earn her an iota of extra attention. To be sure, Lydia was a friend as well as a sister, but their connexion was a bit of an odd beast. Several years ago, Kitty had latched on to Lydia because she needed someone upon whom to model herself—her behaviour and interests. Jane and Elizabeth were their own pair, and several years older than she was, and Mary…well, Mary had no interest in befriending Kitty, likely because Kitty did not understand half of what Mary said and, although she had tried very hard over the course of a fortnight to get her fingers to move properly across the pianoforte keys, she failed to learn even a simple tune. Kitty felt that, if she could be more like Lydia, she would feel like she belonged, and all would be well.

Kitty was not really one for introspection, but something she overheard her father and Elizabeth talking about at breakfast had captured her interest and had not let go, even after more than five hours. As a consequence, she went to find Elizabeth, and left Lydia to trim her own gown in preparation for the upcoming assembly. Their new neighbour, Mr Bingley, was expected to be there, which added to their collective excitement. Elizabeth was in the gardens, sitting on the wood bench beneath the large chestnut tree. Seeing Kitty, she closed her book, and smiled.

“Can I ask you about something, Lizzy?” Kitty bit her lower lip and prayed her heart would stop beating so quickly because it was beginning to ache.

“Of course.” Elizabeth gestured to the bench, inviting Kitty to sit. “I am always happy to be of assistance to my sisters, should they need it.”

Kitty sat and proceeded to examine the ground by her feet, the meadow of flowers across from them, the leaves and branches overhead—anything that meant she did not have to look at her sister. It was a struggle to find the right words to introduce the subject she wished to discuss. Elizabeth waited, patiently or not, and Kitty was glad for her silence. She admired Elizabeth, more than any of her other sisters, but she had never admitted it. It was only one of the secrets she kept.

“A-at breakfast,” Kitty began, then faltered.

After a brief interval, Elizabeth said, “I thought the jam was far too sweet, but I do not suppose that or anything else to do with food is why you sought me out. If it helps, Kitty, I promise not to repeat anything you say to me, not unless you give me your permission or I feel I must to ensure your or someone else’s safety.” She spoke softly, and Kitty wished she had enough bravery to link her arm with Elizabeth’s or lean in closer to her for comfort and shelter.

Instead, Kitty nodded. “You and Papa, you were talking— It was about two ladies. From Scotland.”

“Ah, yes,” Elizabeth said when Kitty again failed to find the words to continue. “Miss Pirie and Miss Woods, who were schoolmistresses. I suppose that is what you mean?”

This time, Kitty’s nod was firmer. “Papa said they were accused of…things.”

Elizabeth slid closer to Kitty making their shoulders touch. “One of their former pupils claimed their friendship was more than just friendship, that they were…as women and men usually are to each other. Do you understand what I mean?”

Kitty bit her lips together and kept her eyes on the ground. At length, she whispered, “I did not know it was possible.”

Elizabeth spoke softly, whether to soothe Kitty or to prevent anyone from overhearing them, she did not know. “It is. Some men engage in…intimate relationships with each other—like what we usually expect of married couples—and some women have similar relationships with each other.”

“Oh.” Kitty lifted her chin, but although her eyes were open, she did not really see anything around her. She felt the oddest sensation in her belly, as if everything was shifting around, puzzle pieces were finding their proper place.

“You understand such connexions are considered illegal and immoral?”

She swallowed against the tightness in her throat before tentatively asking, “W-what do you think? Are such things truly so horrible?”

It took a long time before her sister responded. Before she did, she slipped her hand into Kitty’s. “They are certainly against the law, but as to them being morally wrong, that is not so simple. It might not surprise you to know that Papa and I have debated the matter. He has read more about it than I have—”

All the blood in Kitty’s body flew to her face. “Do not suggest I talk to Papa—”

“I did not intend to, I assure you. I am glad you came to me, Kitty, I truly am, and I am willing discuss it with you as much and as often as you like.”

Kitty fought against tears and was relieved when Elizabeth continued.

“Without being able to actually ask a lady or gentleman who has engaged in such activity why they did so—it would be too dangerous for them to admit it, if not to us, by raising questions about why we were interested—we have only what we have read to guide us. All of it suggests that the way I might feel about a handsome gentleman, one I might look upon as a beau or a husband, is how some men feel about other men and how some women feel about other women. Do you take my meaning?”

Kitty nodded, her gaze once again on the ground.

“I do not know that one can help such feelings,” Elizabeth said. “You like who you like, you love who you love, and, if someone cannot feel that special sort of love for a person of the opposite sex, they cannot. Likewise, if they do feel it for another lady or gentleman, they do. I cannot even begin to speculate how they should act, knowing to admit it or-or live with another woman as though they were husband and wife would bring about grave risk. Even to talk about it, you would have to choose your confidant wisely.”

Again, Kitty nodded. Elizabeth had given her a great deal about which to think. As I knew she would. As exasperated as she becomes with me, Lydia, even Mary, Lizzy will always love us and protect us, as much as she can.

Elizabeth’s voice was livelier when she said, “Do you know, Kitty, I often find myself daydreaming.”

Her brow furrowed, she looked at her sister. “About what?”

“All manner of things. What it was like to live in the past or would be to live in one of the faraway places I read about, but, frequently, I try to imagine the future. If one reads history, which I know you do not, you gain an appreciation of how societies change over time. How we are now is not how we will always be. One day, girls might receive the same education boys do, even the possibility to go to university and become lawyers or anything they might like.” Her voice fell just enough for the change to be discernible as she added, “One day, people will not be so concerned with who other people love, regardless of their sex. Two women or two men might even be permitted to marry each other. I know that is not much comfort to us living in England today, but it brings me comfort to believe the world will be a brighter place for future generations.”

“Me too, Lizzy. Me too.”

They were silent after that, Kitty resting her head on Elizabeth’s shoulder, and Elizabeth humming a song intended to soothe a child.

Thanks for reading! It was a little sombre, but this is where the muse led me. To complete it, let me say I imagine Kitty living a happy life. With Elizabeth’s support (and Darcy’s), she remains unmarried and lives at Pemberley with the Darcys. She finds love.

Sources:

• Moore, Lisa (1992). ‘Something more tender still than friendship’: Romantic friendship in early-nineteenth-century England. Feminist Studies 18(3): 499-511
• Morrison, Robert (2019). The Regency years. During which Jane Austen writes, Napoleon fights, Byron makes love, and Britain becomes modern. W.W. Norton & Company
• Mortimer, Ian (2020). The time traveller’s guide to Regency England. A handbook for visitors to the years 1789-1830. The Bodley Head, Penguin Random House UK