Occupational Hazards

by Maria Grace

author 2_13 webEvery job has its hazards, we all know that. As far as dangerous occupations, writing seems like it should be way down on the list right? Granted carpal tunnel problems from pen or keyboard can be an issue, but beyond that, paper cuts seem like they’d be the next biggest danger.

Well, there are others perils writers face along the journey.

For example, I used to be able to run out of the house without a purse, just a phone and wallet and I was good to go. Now my purse is more like a backpack. I am never without a pen and paper handy, actually two pens, since one will invariably run out of ink at a critical moment, and a highlighter too. Yes, I know about the notepad app on the phone, but the battery can run out and it can hang at the most crucial moment, not to mention research says that we use more of our creative brain capacity when we use pen and paper.

So, my back is at risk if I have to lug that silly purse around too long.

I am certain my hearing has changed too. I swear I hear things that I never did before. A few weeks ago, an acquaintance of mine told the story of how he escaped from Romania as a young man. I grabbed my handy pad and furiously scribble down notes. No, I wasn’t taking plot notes, I was trying to capture his absolutely amazing genuine Transylvanian accent. I took down his phrasing., His dialectic use of syntax was just too good to miss…I was go to work…I make only nine months in army… I try everything what I know… they did not to let me do—I couldn’t get enough!

Writing, it seems, is making me hear things, too.CDO cat

Without a doubt, writing has brought back a ranging case of CDO (it’s like OCD, but in alphabetical order, like it should be!). I didn’t used to care whether the British drank tea from tea cups or tea bowls in 1801. The year ‘Confound it!’ was in common use never crossed my mind. Stiff boned, tightly laced corsets in Regencies never fazed me. Now I can spend hours chasing down seemingly trivial facts. Worse still, it is not enough to get the information. No, I may as well be back in graduate school. I must book mark all the sites, copy the references—with full citations of course—and file them with cross references. Then they get added to Pinterest. After all, one never knows when the colors used in the Regency fashion or the difference between a curricle and a phaeton might be important.

Back problems, hearing things and compulsive behavior, what else could happen?

If you ask my family, they would probably tell you there needs to be a new classification for grammar induced post-traumatic stress disorder. I am sure it must have been triggered when proofreading my first manuscript. I used to be able to dangle infinitives and split participles—scratch that, other way round—with aplomb. Now, I can’t get within arm’s length of a present participial phrase without lunging for a red pen and muttering invectives under my breath. Passive voice makes me twitch. I actually know the difference between a coordinating and a subordinating conjunction, which one gets a comma, and why. I keep a twelve page chest sheet on correct comma usage just in case I ever forget. The upside of it, I suppose is my kids have stopped asking me to proofread their papers. I grade harder than the English teachers do and I’ve been known to correct the teacher’s mistakes. In email. In all bright red text.

I only did that once, that doesn’t mean I’m really messed up does it? Well maybe.

Sometimes I miss the days when historical errors in books did not blip my radar. I would like to walk past a sign with a ‘grocer’s apostrophe’ and not shudder. What a pleasure it would be not to notice inaccurate set dressing in period movies. I think my family might enjoy that too, at least for a little while.dragon

But, where would I be without all those worlds in my head? Who would talk to me at 3AM if not the beloved characters who dwell in my mind? What would sons and I talk about over pizza and root beer if not for the secret community of dragons that live under the British countryside only interacting with a select few on the Ton?

Oh, wait, you weren’t supposed to know about that. Just forget it.

All in all, it’s not so bad. As long as I have pen and paper in reach, all my researched is backed up on three separate hard drives, and ‘there’, ‘their’ and ‘they’re’ are used properly in all incoming email, I’m fine. Really.

 

 

Published: January 23, 2013

20 comments on “Occupational Hazards”

    1. dianna a.
      I wish I were blessed with the proofreading skills you possess probably at this very moment whilst reading my comment. :grin:

        1. Maria Grace
          The funny thing is that I do not consider myself a really good proofreader, which makes this very ironic.Thanks Dianna!

    1. Marilyn Brant
      A secret community of dragons??!! I’m so intrigued, Grace!Wonderful post! And, yes, I know what you mean about how writing changes our senses… The world is filled with memorable character traits and significant details and compelling plots. There’ll never be enough time to write about even a fraction of them, but we can try. ;)

        1. Maria Grace
          My sons love the dragons and really want me to write a Regency /fantasy with them. They’ve even gone so far as to start working out the sociological differences between sea dragons and land dragons and how the communities conflict. I just need about 48 hours in the day to get it all written!Thanks Marilyn!

    1. Sophia Rose
      Very insightful and amusing all at once! I’m not sure if I should admire you or pity you being blessed for your historical acumen and your editorial eye. :grin:Thanks Maria!

        1. Maria Grace
          I’m not sure either, frankly. :lol:Thanks, Sophia!

    1. BeckyC
      What a fun project with your boys. Sounds like they are helping with the research.Love the post! Very amusing. Love the cat! (no sentence structure here, lol)

        1. Maria Grace
          My family has threatened to print me a ‘T’ shirt with that cat.Thanks, Becky!

    1. Lisa S
      LOL! I know exactly how you feel. And then it drives me crazy when I make all those same mistakes myself when writing. The mistakes are so much easier to notice when reading other peoples’ work than my own. I seem to have blinders on when proof-reading my own stuff such that I see only what I intended to write, not what’s actually on the page. :) Oh, and I think a fantasy dragon/P&P sounds great. :)

        1. Maria Grace
          That is exactly what happens to me. I just read what I should have put down instead of what is exactly there.Still working on the dragon ideas….Thanks, Lisa!

    1. Monica P
      Ah, I hate grocer’s apostrophes! I didn’t know they actually had a name until now. If it makes you feel better, I have learned a lot about the Regency period from reading your stories and blog posts. Do you ever use a handheld voice recorder instead of a notepad to capture things quickly?

    1. Vera Nazarian
      Great post! As someone in the throes of multiple edits, boy do I relate! *gasp* Letters are swimming before my eyes! :-)

    1. Shannon Winslow
      Here’s a couple more occupational hazards I’ve discovered. I can no longer read for the pure pleasure of it. I’m always critiquing the work and getting distracted by annoying things like word repeats (my personal pet peeve). Also, I can no longer write a simple tweet or email without editing and rewriting (and, yes, that includes this comment). I obviously need a support group or a 12-step program. Join me, anybody?

    1. Karana
      I think they have a medication for that. Lol. Funny post.

    1. Susan Mason-Milks
      Good to know I’m not the only one who keeps a little notebook and pen in my purse at all times! I have a little confession to make – not just any pen will do! I only write with medium point pens and in blue ink. Black ink literally stops my brain from working. My very favorite is the Pilot G-2 #10, and it’s hard to find in the stores. It seems that the rest of the world prefers fine or extra fine point. So, Maria, now you know you’re not the only person who’s OCD (or ODC) about something. And by the way – I can still diagram a sentence!

    1. Jane Odiwe
      I recognise all of that, Maria. I’m sure my memory has improved too-love listening and memorising conversations heard on the bus and in cafes! Lovely post!

    1. Jakki L.
      Great post, Grace! I understand about correcting your son’s teacher. I am still contemplating whether or not I should tell my son’s preschool teacher that on the sign hanging from her desk she used the wrong “affect.” It has been up all year and not a single person has said something. But I fear coming across as snotty.I enjoyed your post on “Confound it” too! :grin:

    1. Cassie Grafton
      Love this post, fun to read and also enlightening!Despite copious editing, I know I still fall foul of some of the aforementioned grammatical errors (though I think I am confident on my apostrophes!) :sad:It really does help to hear from a talented author like yourself that you used to have similar experiences, but that over time and with experience you can spot them lurking with ease! It gives me hope for my own efforts… :smile:Love the CDO cat, and do please tell your sons that the subterranean dragon communities of Britain are alive and well and send their best wishes to the enlightened young gentlemen! (They may have already seen one of their number on the Welsh flag, representing the mountain dwelling community!)

    1. Regina Jeffers
      No matter how many times I read a piece, soon the story is in my head rather than the grammar. I know the differences between “further” and “farther” or between “sit” and “set,” but sometimes my eyes see the correct word rather than the incorrect one because I’m so engrossed in the story. There is a “reading maxim,” which says that the average person only reads the first few letters and the last few letters of a word. It this is true, it explains why we do not catch every error.

    1. Lúthien84
      Enjoyed this informative post, Maria. Becoming an author is not easy and takes skills, patience and perseverance to become successful, just like any other job. I admire your lot and hope you continue to spin more stories that we love.

6 comments

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    • Sheila L. M. on February 4, 2014 at 3:01 pm
    • Reply

    I am not a writer so I cannot comment on those experiences. But I was a EL ED teacher for a time and as soon as I had earned my teaching certificate found that I could no longer spell. I learned a trick. “OK, class, I am going to spell some words wrong on purpose. I will reward anyone who finds a mistake with…” (could be a dime or a quarter – although if you misspell a lot the latter could be expensive). This was especially true with blackboard writing. I didn’t dare correct a teacher who told my daughter that “conquer” was the incorrect spelling of “concer”. We looked it up in the dictionary so she would know she was correct but I explained that this particular teacher would hold a grudge if my daughter or I corrected her. My pet peeve is those who can’t put an apostrophe on the first of a double possessive, i.e., Susan’s and Mary’s wagons. I keep a pencil by my rocker to print in corrections. And we all read what we meant to write, be it author or layperson.

    1. Yep. I an really bad about that. The years when I was teaching, I could find my students’ errors, but mine are another story!

    • Chanpreet on February 5, 2014 at 10:12 pm
    • Reply

    If I find an error in a book I’m reading, I’ll make a note of it and bring it to the author’s attention. Of course I’ll try to be as polite about it as possible. It sounds like being able to edit the way you do is both a blessing and a curse.

    • Anji on February 6, 2014 at 8:55 am
    • Reply

    Maria, I love this post about grammar and punctuation. I get really wound up by inappropriate apostrophes when I see them in signs for public display. Have you ever read the book by Lynn Truss called “Eats, Shoots and Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation”? My copy actually had a sheet of stickers in it so that one could cover up any offending punctuation marks one came acros and could easily access.

      • Anji on February 6, 2014 at 9:01 am
      • Reply

      P.S. As a sci-fi geek and huge fan of Anne McCaffrey as well as Jane Austen, a P & P variation involving dragons would be amazing.

      I also have an ever evolving handbag (purse to you guys over the pond). The one I use for work is now a backpack like yours and my husband wants to know if I keep bowling balls in it!

    • Sheila L. M. on February 6, 2014 at 1:27 pm
    • Reply

    If I am reading a paperback version I just note the correction, but now with Kindle I find myself ignoring some but on one book with many authors and already on a second edition I did not the typos and sent such to one author. I hope I did not offend in doing so b/c I just love having all these books to read, typos or not.

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