Mistress of Longbourn, Once Again — 72 Comments

  1. Omg! I have not read this book yet, but it does sound intriguing if this is an excerpt from it, or is this the March Madness Mix-ups?

    Mrs. Bennet and Mr. Collins who would have thought to put them together?! I am not sure I want to think of the two of them together. Considering their personalities, they could work.

    • Thanks Patty! And no worries, this isn’t part of a longer work, just my little foray into the monthly theme! 🙂 Thanks for reading it!

  2. Love your mashup, Amy, even though it’ll give me the night terrors. Great to have you here at Austen Variations (I’ll teach you the secret handshake later).

  3. Ugh! I should have had my breakfast before reading this as I’m not sure I can face it now! 😞 But on the other hand I think they deserve each other and surely Charlotte will find someone less repulsive?
    Thanks for sharing this Amy (I think!) although I think your next post should be about the ardent love between ODC to make up for this 😍

  4. I couldn’t stop laughing when I read this. The best part was imagining a possible future meeting between Mrs. Bennet and Lady Catherine. This needs to be expanded into a full length novel. I never saw the end coming until the end and it was worth waiting for. Love love love this!

  5. Amy, as always, you are so funny! Congratulations on your new release and becoming an author on Austen Variations. Jen Red

  6. That was great fun, Amy!!! To think that Mrs Bennet was only 40, very young indeed!!
    Congrats on becoming an author on Austen Variations!!!

    • Thanks Daniela! I know the miniseries have done Mrs BEnnet a bit of a disservice, I think she was probably not nearly as aged as they cast her! 🙂

  7. All I can say is WOW. What a pair-up. However, they do deserve each other. Mrs Bennett, although very concerned about her daughters getting married always wanted at least one of them to make a most advantageous match. She was always looking out for herself too. Sometimes I wonder just whose future was of most concern to her….her daughters or herself. Thanks for this little tidbit. Most intriguing. No one has ever taken us down this particular road before. You are striking out on an entirely new path. Kudos!

  8. Look forward to reading more of your writing! This was so much fun. I’ve always thought Mrs Bennet could be relatively young. This could definitely be a full length novel….I’m enjoying thinking about it right now lol

  9. OMG: not in a hundred years would I have imagined this pairing…I am smiling ear to ear at the though of it or should I be gagging? Mrs. Bennet only forty? So she has not yet gone through menopause and could still bear children? Stop it! Have to get my mind away from that thought. I am sure Mrs. Bennet will provide a few more ways of persuasion on that walk…somewhere that is hidden from view?

    Thanks for the laugh…I already ate my breakfast…now to keep it down.

    • That would be rather ironic wouldn’t it? All those years of NOT giving Mr B a son, and then she gives Mr. Collins one instead! Lets not consider the details on that one !! 🙂

      Thanks Sheila!

  10. Ha Ha! I remember when reading P&P years ago that I wished Mrs. B could marry Collins if she was going to tout his eligibility as a suitor. Here she did! Disgusting and so, so fitting. Collins is stupid enough to fall for it to. Perhaps he’s the last generation on the entail and Longbourn can go to someone more worthy? Thanks!

    • Now that would REALLY be a twist, if Mrs Bennet and Mr Collins failed to produce an heir and it went to yet another long lost cousin! Ha! Thank you!

  11. Welcome – I am so happy you are here! I just recently read everyone of your stories on and I am a huge fan.

    Today’s post was shocking & uncomfortable in a good way! I could not previously imagine such a pair, but it would make for an interesting story line. I look forward to your further posts and hearing about your upcoming works.

    • Wow thanks for reading all my stuff (its quite a collection over there, good, bad and ugly haha!) and for allowing me to shock and discomfit this morning! LOL! Thank you so much Madenna!

  12. I can’t determine whether WOW, OMG, Haha, or REALLY!!! should be first comment. Mrs. Bennet and Collins together. Well stupidity loves company and it saves the Misses Bennets from his grasp. Reminds me of the movie title, Dumb and Dumber. Yikes.

  13. Welcome, Amy!! And what an entrance you’ve made–you have put Caroline Bingley to utter shame!! 😀

    Thank you for that hilariously horrific scene–I’m not certain whether to laugh or to gag. 😉

    Thank you for quite an interesting start to my day!!

    Susanne 🙂

  14. Very interesting! And why not. As an older woman I can see the possibilities. It will be very entertaining to read more. Keep it coming. Can you image the girls’ reaction?

    • OMG… poor Lizzy, can you imagine Mr. Collins is your spurned suitor one day and your stepfather the next! Haha!
      Thank you Sandra!

  15. Congratulations and welcome!!! So excited to have you and your writings here! You must have had a nightmare to conjure this one up! I loved the line “…an older lady does not need to glow if she smoulders instead.” I do think you need to expand on this little vignette! I would love to know what the girls would think on this match-up. I’m sure there would be alot of squealing going on and not just from the girls! Shuddering with that thought! LOL!

  16. Welcome and blech. Just *shudder* blech. LOL Maybe she can have a son and pass it off as Mr. Bennet’s and then break the entail, leaving Mr. Collins on the outside. 🙂 Yes, that would be evil and conniving but not beyond the reach… O:-)

    • Perhaps, although Mr. Bennet is dead in this little scenario of mine, so that might make it tough! 🙂 Thank you Stephanie!

  17. Amy! Mrs Bennet and Mr Collins?!? Haha That is actually pretty brilliant. She’s not as much of a dingbat as she seems, eh? Oh dear, what will Lady Catherine say?

    I’m happy you’ve joined AV! 🙂

      • Hey there Monica! LOL, you know me, always a bizarre line of thought to follow 😉 As for Mrs Bennet… I generally think of her being early 40s, being that Jane was 22 so 40 is not too much a stretch!

        Thanks girl!

  18. Welcome Amy and thank you for sharing! It’s so funny I never thought of pairing them before. I wouldn’t put it past her if it meant keeping Longbourn!

  19. Such a fun twist on May-December romance, Amy. And how dignified of Mrs B to keep her hands above the table. Thanks for sharing another tale, my prolific friend.

  20. Thanks for making me chuckle this morning Amy – and what a debut piece! I actually saw the picture of Alex Kingston (my favourite Mrs. Bennet, btw) before I read the text and then when I saw the words “Regency Cougar”, I knew what was coming. Knew it, but was still kind of horrified/gobsmacked/delighted the more I read! My mind has her playing the scene as a kind of mashup of her Mrs. Bennet from Lost in Austen and her River Song from Doctor Who. Don’t know if you’ll have seen the latter, but she’s one of my favourite recurring, non-regular characters from that series.

    You’re so right about the age that Mrs. Bennet is always cast. When Alex Kingston played her in Lost in Austen, she was about 45, almost the right age to my mind. She and Hugh Bonneville made a great couple in that, I thought. Many thanks once again.

    • She my favorite Mrs Bennet too! LOL! For her looks if nothing else, most other Mrs Bennets just seem too old!So glad you enjoyed my little tale — thanks for commenting!

  21. Amy! What a terrific surprise to find your writing here. You always have a fascinating take on JA’s characters and you don’t disappoint in MoL,OA. I can just imagine the reaction of Mrs Bennet’s daughters to the surprise announcement that she plans to wed Mr Collins herself. The interesting thing is that Mrs Bennet may actually have a better marriage this time around because she will be training the master to make him the husband she wants.


    • Thank you Ruth! Yes can you just imagine Elizabeth’s face! I think that’s an even worse shock than Mr C and Charlotte! 🙂

  22. Congratulations on joining the Austen Variations group of authors, Amy.

    I wouldn’t have considered these two characters together before but to keep from being thrown into the hedgerows, it wouldn’t surprise me!

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